You Got To Fight.
I just finished reading "The Color Purple" (I know, I know! Took me waaaay too long to do it!) and it was just as beautiful and heartbreaking as I thought it would be. From the beginning, this thought from Celie resonated so powerfully within me:
But she keep on. You got to fight. You got to fight.
But I don't know how to fight. All I know how to do is stay alive.
When I read that passage, it hit me so hard, I had to sit for a moment before continuing to read. Alice Walker summarized me in two lines.
Yesterday, though, my own story took a turn. I leapt forward toward the life I wanted to live. I fought. It was such a small act to someone else, but it took everything I had in me.
I treaded water for decades before realizing I could swim. I kept waiting for something to happen to me, not knowing I was the one that needed to move. In order to tackle my dreams, I have to tend to all those experiences that had threatened to break me so long ago. I have to face those demons and reset those wounds so they heal properly.
This is, by far, the hardest journey I've ever taken. My deliverance doesn't look as pretty as I thought it would, honestly. It's nasty, filthy, necessary work, but will give way to something glorious.
So not only will I fight, but I will emerge victorious.